Forgiveness.

 

I received an email recently from a very bitter person who has unforgiveness in his heart from something that happened many years ago.  Reading that email broke my heart.  The amount of bitterness was overwhelming.  I wanted to respond right away. 

I wanted to ‘fix’ it. 

I know Lord…

Back to my “fix it” mode. 

Instead, I sat on it.  Then I prayed.  Then I asked the Lord what to do.

What a concept - right?

What came from my prayer time was this message.

• 1.    Unforgiveness causes cancer
• 2.    Forgiveness does not always mean reconciliation 
• 3.    Forgiveness is a lifelong process  
• 4.      Forgiving yourself in in this equation  

First – Unforgiveness causes cancer in our soul.  It not only breaks us down physically, but it breaks us down spiritually.  When I am unforgiving towards someone I hurt physically.  My body aches as I carry that anger towards someone.  It hurts all the way down to my toes. 

Then it hurts me spiritually.  My relationship with God is hindered because I have unforgiveness in my heart.  It says in scripture:

And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”  Mark 11:25

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Matthew 6:14-15

I need to forgive.  For my health, but most importantly for my relationship with my God.  My prayers are hindered if I have unforgiveness in my heart towards someone else. 

Honestly - all I really need to do is get a little perspective. 

Look what He did for me.  He sent His son to forgive my sins.  He forgave me when I was unforgivable.  He still does every time I ask.  Who am I to not forgive someone for anything they have done to me?  No matter what.  Is it easy?  NO.  Sometimes it is not.  Sometimes it takes GOD to step in and give me the strength to do it. 

But all I need to do is take the first step.  He does the rest.  Yes, it is hard, but yes it can be done.  With God.

Next – Forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation.  God Always calls us to forgive.  However, that command doesn’t always come with reconciliation.  The rest is up to God and that other person.  The situation may be unstable, unsafe, or otherwise.  It takes prayer and discernment to take the next steps of reconciliation… or not.  Let the Holy Spirit lead you.  Sometimes it takes time.  Time can heal the wound.  Other times, it may take an intervention of the Lord. 

Either way, we serve a BIG GOD so leave it in HIS hands.  Never give up on reconciliation. Never give up on GOD.  PRAY for that person. 

I have SEEN MIRACLES in my lifetime.  He can do it in Your life too!

Next – Forgiveness is a lifelong process.  This was a shocker for me.  I thought once I forgave someone, I would never feel those feelings of frustration again.  Wrong.  I am human.  It is an ongoing process.  It creeps up on me at times and I have to hand it over to HIM once again. 

A good word picture is holding a bag of ‘schtuff’ as I often call it.  I hand it to God and tell Him that I am giving it over to Him to fix.  I turn around to go about my business and look down.  Lo and behold, in my hands I am once again holding my bag of ‘schtuff’ again.  “How did it get there?”  I must have picked it back up without even thinking.  “Here God, I am giving it back to You, again.”  And the process continues. 

We are human.  We cling to our things.  We need to give our baggage to God.  He’s got this.  He’s got us!

And Finally – Forgive yourself.  I left this one for last on purpose.  We tend to extend grace to others easier than we do to ourselves.   My husband and I held a small group over the weekend and our topic was laughing at the foolish things we did in life.  I thought it would be a great funny topic.  Well, it backfired on me because I realized I have a hard time laughing at myself sometimes because, again, giving grace to myself is harder than to others.

What a revelation.

Forgiving myself was harder than I thought. 

Extend grace to yourself.  There is only one perfect ONE.  Don’t expect perfection in yourself.  Lean on the one who is Perfect.

 

Back to that person who sent me the email.

I will be praying for him.

I have seen miracles.  I serve a VERY BIG GOD. I believe for another one.  Will you pray with me?

Love you all!

 

For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”

Matthew 18:20

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